Me 'n' God in Our Place

That's what I love about having God in my life. Sometimes I want to close the world door, and the world windows and realize with my spirit that it's just The Lord and me. We're writing our own story. I have a secret place with Him.

I may not be praying. I may not be having "quiet time". Other people may be in the room talking, even to me. It's really better than quiet time. Quiet time is hard to come by, as we all well know. When I was a young mom with one two or three kids, it was near impossible to get into a "prayer closet". I used to listen to preachers talk about such a thing and marvel at the prospect, feeling woefully spiritually inadequate. For goodness sake, I was fortunate to be able to go to the bathroom for a few minutes! Now my kids are grown and I have more time and freedom to seclude myself during prayer. But I lost something if that's my "God time". All the time is God time.

 This Secret Place Is is afforded to anyone who is a friend of Jesus, so if you have not, please seek him out and find that He is waiting for you there. (Psalm 91:1 "He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty",  and   John 15:13-15: "...greater love than this hath no one, that any one his life may lay down for his friends; ye are my friends, if ye may do whatever I command you;  no more do I call you servants, because the servant hath not known what his lord doth, and you I have called friends, because all things that I heard from my Father, I did make known to you." 

This God place fosters a full-time reverence and mindfulness for what He wants and what His wishes are; and an aversion to what He does not like. Just knowing with a peace only He can be about, that it's a place I own and God is in it; He grants me that, is purely awesome.

I Desperately Need to Remind Myself of the Source of My Joy

I didn't expect this list to be this long! The more I wrote, the more I thought, the more I realized how many things I have been guilty of relying on for joy outside of the LORD. ("In Your [the Lord's] presence is fullness of joy." Psalm 16:11) I'm writing it down with verbiage for universal application so everyone can relate. My commitment:

The source of my joy is not my health, (physical, mental, spiritual).

The source of my joy is not my age.

The source of my joy is not my income.

The source of my joy is not my family or loved ones.

The source of my joy is not my church.

The source of my joy is not my job or business.

The source of my joy is not my spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend.

The source of my joy is not my activities and hobbies.

The source of my joy is not my stuff.

The source of my joy is not my SELF.

The source of my joy is not the weather.

The source of my joy is not the season.

The source of my joy is not food.

The source of my joy is not any other consumable item.

The source of my joy is not my vacations.

The source of my joy is not my weekends/free time.

The source of my joy is not my most cherished hobby (scrapbooking for me).

The source of my joy is not my success.

The source of my joy is not my accomplishments.

The source of my joy is not any status in my life.

The source of my joy is not monetary gain/money in any form.

The source of my joy is not in other like-minded people. This includes fellowship for us Christians.

The source of my joy is not entertainment/sports.

The source of my joy is not social media.

The source of my joy is not cultural enrichment.

The source of my joy is not education.

The source of my joy is not in volunteering.

The source of my joy is not in giving.

The source of my joy is not in how I treat others with kindness and courtesy.

The source of my joy is not self-enrichment, self-improvement, or professional development.

The source of my joy is not my healthy lifestyle.

The source of my joy is not my choices.

The source of my joy is not in my accrued experience.

I think I will just close with this:

The source of my joy is not _____________________(fill in the blank with WHATEVER)

My Little Faith Story

Foundationally (the bottom line) is Someone made all this. Too many intricate, diverse  and insanely well organized systems for it to all be anything but Intelligent design. Historically:  A precious gift handed down from my parents. Personally: A conversation with that mysterious Someone Who does things I don't always understand, but the fact that He is the Someone that made all this silences my "But what about?"s  My Point of Reference: 1. The Bible. It has a human factor, but the accuracy is there in its history and it's  rich with wisdom and truth. 2. Creation, the work of this Intelligent Design Master - I just look around and marvel but I also get to know Him by what He made. So that all is the Why and the Who. But there is more. The What. I am not Him, my life and stuff I do can never match Him that is the reason I need the Bridge. I fail, I fail and sometimes I don't even know it until after the fact. So He made a Bridge,a way for me to succeed. He made a Way and the Way is Jesus, who deletes my failures AKA sin.  I SURELY do not understand the whole "salvaion story" - I don't get why it had to be the way it was. But I DO get that I have and will continue to fail (AKA sin) so I might as well stop catering to that and accept a little help, no actually a lot of help, all the help I need. He died to save me and He helps me because I let him, by leading and guiding and giving me a PEACE and JOY I cannot adequately describe with words. I could write more, and I can definitely elaborate and go into my whole "How did I get saved" story, feel free to ask.
So that is - my Little Faith Story.

Days Are Getting Shorter.

It’s that time of year again, gets darker earlier in the evening and we wait longer for daylight in the morning. Then we have the Time Change weekend coming up and I know that throws a lot of folks off. Personally, I like the Fall Back because we get an extra hour of sleep. But the darker cold weather months can affect me and others mentally.  And there are some therapeutic measures to take—here’s a list: Scented Candles, more lights on (LED bulbs burn less energy), decorate for Fall and don’t stop after Christmas. My favorite winter perk-up is an electric fireplace or stove with the flickering flames. Yes it does help. Foremost, stay your mind on the Best, the Giver of life and Light of the world.* 

*”You will keep perfectly peaceful the one whose mind remains focused on you, because he remains in you,” said Isaiah the prophet in his 26^th chapter. 

My Go-To For When Things Are Just Not Right

This is not necessarily an every day all day kind of situation. My life is full of all kinds of moments day to day. Some are mundane, some are challenging, some are bright and cheery. But then I get that phone call or that memory or that whatever it is  that makes me feel very small against the problem. For example:

I am live witness to a manifestation of sin and it saddens me. I hate when it is that in-my-face, run-me-over type manifestation. I feel helpless. I flail uselessly, recalling better times, wishing, praying wondering why. What a vain struggle. I give that overwhelming concern to the Lord. (I need to repeat this like an exercise, as it's not a One and Done kind of thing.)  When my role or sphere of influence is non-existent or diminished The Lord can handle  it and take it from here. His roles never change. Oh Hallelujah!

Note: In the scripture quoted below, my concept of the enemy is whatever situation that I'm dealing with that  is "Just Not Right", not a person or spiritual entity.

"When the enemy comes in like a flood, The Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard against him." Isaiah 59:19

Good Friday-How it Works for Me

And it’s a cloudy Good Friday. Good Fridays gone by, growing up Roman Catholic, I attended the observance at church. I see now it is called a Solemn Liturgical Service, but I think it was called something else when I was young. I love my Roman Catholic roots even though I am in a non-Catholic church now. I remember the Catholic Good Friday event included Stations of the Cross. If you have never attended one, it is very enriching and moving. My view of Christian staples like church services, dogma and doctrine have radically changed in the last five years. I even have different thoughts about watching dramatizations about what transpired on Good Friday. But mainly, I am so not about this being about religion. Religion as defined by me: doing things solely because of tradition and/or doing things in an effort to please God and/or doing things out of compulsion/subversion without your heart in it. What happened on Good Friday was horrific and extremely frightening, I think. I really do not want to replay it. I'm not a huge Beatles fan, but the following familiar lines from "Help" describe me then and now, and the main reason for Good Friday - I need help.  A Savior helps; he comes to Help and Help is what I need.

When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never needed anybody's help in any way.  But now these days are gone I'm not so self-assured.  Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the door-John Lennon.

Before I knew how much I needed Jesus, when I was 21, I accepted His help.  Life happened and I took my hits and with years came a keen and desperate awareness of how much I did need Help. I have never looked back.

So, what Good Friday's event did for me and what it means to me, that’s something I do want to replay because I want and need help. Personally and publicly I would like to thank Jesus for helping me. 

Weaving

remember these?

When I started this blog I wanted it to be reflections on my prayer journal going back a few months. Whenever I reread what I wrote I am pleasantly surprised and pleased at my progress, no bragging, just simply, the journaling works! So I am going to bring the old journal entries full circle with today in this and future posts. “Only God can take my jumble of random thoughts and feelings and make any sense of them”. (July 2015)

I will be doing some scrapbooking today.  Scrapbooking, like weaving past struggles now overcome, with the present, is therapeutic. I recollect and reflect. My heart and core is “Mother” so that dimension surfaces often. My mother was part and parcel the same way. She was a mom at heart and spoke of things mother often. And she was an encyclopedic resource of child-rearing information for me. Ever get a power surge of emotion from something incidental? I was looking up the name of my favorite cologne maker, Estee Lauder, specifically “Estee”, and had a surge of emotion from the old days of picking out baby names. Really? But we have to pay attention to ourselves. From this I learned that I am not making all this up about this mom stuff, it’s just IN me.

I learn from scrapbooking. In their grown-up selves and when viewing their old photos and mementos, I see elements of myself in each of my children, little glimmers. Things they say or do, like punctuation, direct me to the origin, which is myself. Oh that is me in them, I say to myself with surprise.  And interestingly, each seems to have captured different elements of me. I wonder what would have happened if I continued to have more than three kids—would I know even more about myself through them?

Scrapbooking also is restorative. I have real estate that is my property and I rejoice that it is MINE ALL MINE and no one and no thing can take it away! That is such a good feeling and a powerful one too. I can call this Mental Scrapbooking, no Hobby Lobby purchase required. Remind yourself that what God has given no one can take away, no circumstance, no life event, no loss, no one.

Now, here's dichotomy or irony or something like that for you. As good as it is for me, I have to force myself to do my scrapbook. Why? More on that later. But for now, another quote that can apply to that dilemma or lots of other stuff too: “It's hard work... But I'm going to do it.” (July 2015) By the grace of God